Build the Life You Want: The Art and Science of Getting Happier

The introduction to Build the Life You Want sets up one of the book’s central themes: Individual Agency as a Key to Happiness. In the initial anecdote, the authors emphasize that although Albina’s life was difficult, she was able to create a happier life through her own conviction and hard work. Brooks depicts Albina’s tough circumstances with descriptive imagery, stating, “As a little girl in the 1930s, she had lived through the brutal Spanish Civil War, some of it in hiding, often going hungry and seeing death and suffering all around her” (xx). These vivid details make the revelation of Albina’s happy life all the more impactful, for the underlying implication is that a person’s circumstances do not necessarily dictate the level of their happiness. Accordingly, Brooks and Winfrey drive home their larger philosophical point by revealing that Albina turned her life around and increased her happiness at age 45. This shift is attributed to her newfound sense of agency rather than to a positive shift in her external circumstances. The authors use descriptive language to underscore just how difficult this transition was, stating that Albina’s decision to enroll in college and build a career as a teacher while raising a family “was completely exhausting, but it was a life-changing success” (xxi). This statement not only highlights Albina’s determination and resilience, but it also reinforces the message that individual agency can lead to increased happiness.

Moreover, the introduction introduces a theme that is explored in the following chapter: The Inextricable Nature of Happiness and Unhappiness. Brooks and Winfrey acknowledge that the building blocks of happiness all contain some unhappiness in the form of effort, pain, and sacrifice. For example, Albina’s journey toward a happier life was not painless or easy, for it was characterized by hard work and determination, and even when she achieved her goal of becoming a teacher, her new job, while fulfilling, was deeply challenging. As the authors state, “She now embarked on a new career she loved, teaching in an economically marginalized neighborhood where she served children and families in poverty” (xxi). Albina’s story therefore aligns with the authors’ exploration of satisfaction and purpose in Chapter 1, for the satisfaction of her achievement was derived through hard work and the sense of purpose she gained even as she worked to overcome new challenges.

The introduction also hints at the theme of The Importance of Interpersonal Connection. Although Albina’s husband abandoned her, leaving her and her children to descend into poverty, she reconciled with him 14 years later, and they spent the rest of their lives together. Later in the book, Brooks and Winfrey make the argument that conflict is a normal part of interpersonal relationships, especially relationships with family members. The authors also believe that these relationships are so important that one should “never give up on them” (124). The authors cite forgiveness as a key component in maintaining these relationships, which is evident in Albina’s story.

While the introduction encapsulates the book’s themes in an anecdote, Chapter 1 sets up a more direct framework for exploring the concept of happiness and unhappiness in greater depth, for Brooks and Winfrey will use this section to establish key definitions for the terms that are most relevant to their arguments. By clearly redefining terms such as happiness, unhappiness, enjoyment, satisfaction, and purpose, the authors also make it a point to challenge traditional notions and lay the groundwork for a nuanced exploration of these concepts throughout the book. Chapter 1 also introduces Brooks and Winfrey’s evolutionary-based approach to explaining emotions. For example, they address unhappiness by describing it as a survival mechanism, stating, “The human brain reserves space specifically to process negative emotions. And thank goodness: negative emotions don’t just help us achieve enjoyment, satisfaction, and purpose; they also keep us alive” (19). This assertion establishes a firm basis for the following three chapters, which focus on the use of emotional self-management, a tool that can help individuals to navigate and manage their emotions more effectively. In those chapters, Brooks and Winfrey will argue that unhappiness is useful because it keeps humans safe, but that it is sometimes misplaced. They acknowledge that it may feel unnatural to apply emotional self-management techniques, but they assert that it is a necessary skill for building a happy life.